living in a nightmare
there's a song
playing inside my head
can't turn it off
it goes on and on
and tortures me
a song of death
with lines sharp as knives
a song of loss and pain
cuts my heart in two
makes me bleed hot tears
until there is nothing left
to cry with
until I choke
on a hundred unsaid words
until the solitude
screams volumes
and the sad song stops
but now I am forced to listen
to the ice cold sound
of the void
used, spat out
it whispers
like something undesirable
found in a bite of food
lies, all lies
every word he said
did he get
a good laugh out of it
I wonder
used, spat out
not for the first time
but the pain is new
each time it happens
and the hurt
is gnawing at my entrails
is ravaging my soul
I will survive this, too
I reply to the
whispering voice
I've been through worse |
my
love so far away
distance
drives thorny stakes
through my heart
rams a spike
through my gut
and kills me
in a mess of bits and bytes
loneliness
keeps me up at night
caught in the
old nightmares
again and again
makes me want to scream
so much pent-up anguish
seeking to escape
darkness
beckons with a bony hand
come, old friend
it whispers
drags me down with it
into the hissing shadows
and the cold steel vise
of my own fear
hope
seems lost in this abyss
but once more
reason and the voice I love
come to the rescue
in the nick of time
but still the gnawing pain
of not being with you
eats at me
yearning
for your touch
the subtle comfort
of an embrace
too much time
until we meet
too far away
my love, are you
|
for the sisters
I am woman
you kick me in the gut
and I'll cry
like a little girl
curl up in the dark
sick as a dog
but then I'll pick myself up
dust myself off
and
redefine myself
for I am woman
stronger than you think
proud to be
caring, loving,
trusting
proud of my vulnerability
proud not to be callous
no matter how often I get
kicked
I am woman
and I will survive
I stand straight
integrity intact
nobody can
diminish me
or take away my dignity
I am woman
don't even think you got me down
I am woman
don't even think you know me |
hope
dies last
hope dies last
and so
beyond all reason
I still hoped
you cared
I still hoped
you wanted me
I still hoped
it was your
problem talking
I needed this hope
it was all that kept me going
you can take my
dreams away
turn ugly on me
but at least leave me
with the feeling
that I was loved
a little
but that
is not an option
is it?
you messed with my head
and none of it was true
you wanted to see
how far I'd go
well, now you know
you swine
but you did not
break me
I have survived worse
I bear the scars
to prove it
what's one more nick
to one like me
it will heal
and this scar
won't even be the deepest
 |
